A bad start to a good day...

(what a positive attitude..)

1. I had to go to another campus for the training. I had to catch the shuttle from our main campus to this other campus. We waited for about 30 hour before the shuttle was arranged.

2. By the time I reached the campus, it was 10:00 (the training starts at 9:30), so I hurriedly had my breakfast..took a cup of coffee and reached the entrance, swiped my card, and opened the door (otherwise it will not open) with a push. The door hit the wall on the other side and came directly towards me, tumbling the coffee cup in my hand - I had (I still do) coffee all over my shirt and face.

3. I hurriedly went to the the rest room and washed my face, but couldn't do much with the shirt, because it was full of coffee and I would have to soak my shirt if I ought to wash it..

4. Cursing, I came back to the training hall, only to find it empty. I was wondering what happened and tried calling up the trainer and the participants. After repeated attempts the guy picked up and informed me that the training is postponed as he has some urgent work. Thanks,

5. By now, the time was 10:15.. I hurriedly rushed back to my shuttle stop only to find that it has already left. So I just waited till the next shuttle came. I reached office by 11:00

6. My colleagues had good fun poking my ribs, but were offering solaces that the stains didn't look that bad. And on had Brut perfume, so I just sprayed (poured?!) it all over to make the coffee smell to go away.

7. Now I reek of a mix of cappuncino and musk. Prob. Brut people should take note of this new perfume - as I see many people staring at my cubicle (is it my bramai?!)

Frustrations - I just hate them (who loves them?!). Stuck in a situation of which's end you don't see in the near future, or which makes you do something, which you really don't want to.

Many a times, its self instigated - we not doing what we really want to do; we take ourselves for granted, that these are some tradeoffs to be done with our life, so that we get something in return - prob. more dough and the assumption that it ensures more happiness.

But yes, there could be something positive about such frustrations - they can be motivations to help us better our situations. I guess the entire process of evolution from a single celled organism to such a complex human being (with complex problems!) is driven by life's drive to mitigate a frustrating/ unwanted situation and move towards a better life.. for instance, prob. Edison's frustration with candles and wickers, made him invent the electric bulb.

I read 'Choker Bali' by Tagore sometime back. Its a pity that the novel got is publicity (atleast for me) after Rituparno Gosh made it a movie with Aishwarya in the pivotal character.

OK, now 'Choker Bali' means a 'Grain of sand' which by itself has different shades of meaning - it could be a grain of sand which falls in an oyster's shell, causing it to spin a pearl around it; it could also be a grain of sand which falls into an eye and causes pearls of tears to spring out.

Now, should I consider the poem below to be a pearl out of oyster's shell or pearl out of my eyes (rather a pearl that might come out of 'your' eyes?!)... you know what I'd say.. so I'd better not iterate the obvious..

So started the poem in tamil first, and then wanted to experiment by translating (not literally, but the core, yes) into English..

In the dry expanse of the desert sand
Like the wavy path, a viper traced
Short of breath, on a parched land
My past lies spent, all disgraced.

A mind able of unheard victories
A heart willing to wipe every melancholy
A vision to conquer unseen territories
Are they just thoughts of my frivolity?

A flimsy life of heady thought(s)
Painted of vivid colours - dreamy larks,
Fantasies of how I can be God
Is it not all, but a child's farce?

Like a worm living of the dirt
Wishing to sustain life without pain
Am I not one living of this earth?
Just to give up all, someday in vain?!

Why in this romance, should I delve -
To bruise myself with a stupid thought?
I fighting bitterly myself
The pretense of a self, which I'm not?!

ஈரம் இறந்து போன பாலை மணலில்

அனல் காற்றில் விஷ மூச்சு கரய

இரை தேடும் பாம்பின் பாதை போல்

நீண்து கிடக்குது இறந்த காலம்.

சாதனை பல செய்யும் சாதகம்

சூத்திரம் பல படைக்கும் யோக்கியம்

வேதனை பல மாற்றும் பாக்கியம்

என்னுள் இருக்கெனும் கற்பனையில் எதிர்காலம்.

கற்பனை திரத்தால் வாழ்கைக்கு அர்த்தம் காட்டி,

அற்பன் எனையும் அண்டவனென ஆச்சர்யம் ஊடி,

கொன்ட வாழ்விற்கு பல வண்ணம் பூசி,

கண்டும் காணாத பொய் கதை இந்த வாழ்வோ?

மண்ணை நம்பி வாழும் மண்புழு போல்

உலகை அண்டி வாழும் ஒரு புழு இனமோ நான்?

தன் உயிர் காக்க எப்பொதும் உன்டு வாழ்ந்து,

உயிர் மாய்ந்து போகும் மற்றோர் வகையோ நான்?

எதற்கு இத்தனை காவிய கற்பனை?

அது தரும் வேதனை? உன்மை உணர மறுக்கும் மதமை?!

எண்ணோடு நானே அண்ட மறுக்கும் நான்

நான் என நானே நம்புவதை அடையாது தவிக்கும் நான்?!

Never thought I'd ever create my own blog.

Not that I can't think of reasons why one would create a blog; nor do I think that blogs aren't interesting (they are the next best to reading one's diary!), but I never imagined myself having a blog site.

For once, I definitely am not going to update it that frequently. Though I have an uninterrupted access to the net, I consider it slightly lesser than a sin to update my blog site from my office.

That takes me to the 2nd point - Am I not too old to start writing a blog? Now, why talk about (my) age? I guess there are definitely bloggers who have been writing from the 19th century.. (Note: I'm really not that old, if you count age as the difference between the current year and the year when I was born!!!)

And if at all I overcome my generation's (mhm!) definition of rights and wrongs, what would I update it with - personal encounters with everyday life? Something which I like or don't like? General topics? What??

And wouldn't I expect and check frequently if some unsuspecting surfer stumbled on my site and leave some footprints there?

That takes me to the more general question: Why at all people blog?

1. Human beings' basic, sorry natural instinct is to communicate, make themselves heard. That's why. Then why not talk to the person sitting next to you?

2. Its not necessary that the person sitting next to you really has the mental capacity to understand and digest things that you say...
(Some fellow blogger had written about how breasts fascinate him and how Thiruvalluvar has even written about such topics in Kaamathu paal.. I wanted to say 'Hello, for once, pls. stop pulling him inside such topics - this paal is supposed to talk about man-wife relationships and not (just) about the paal giving organ!!! - Now this blogger need not necessarily worry about what I have to think on this topic.. isn't it an advantage?!)

3. So yes, its easy to hide between your blog site's dashing colours; keep your identity safe and yet you can scream about all things that you want to scream about

4. And wow, it does create a sense of fascination - ala 'Kaadal Kotai' types - every male blogger can expect a Devayani (ok, prob. Heera, that sounds more agreeable) behind every anonymous female (blog) poster (what a word!) and ditto with female bloggers (I mean, they can expect an Ajit..) and live every so blissfully in this happy virtual world.

5. Shut up, there are people who generally want to share information. Yes, I agree with it 100%.

Isn't it such an irony that I raise so many such stupid thoughts and skepticism about blogs in my own blog?!

Then why at all, should I have a blog? Frankly speaking, I find myself having more time currently to have idle thoughts and I thought I'd join the gang (No reading between lines - I'm not saying that all bloggers have so much of free time and they put in their idle thoughts in the blog).

But I was just contemplating the idea, when I stumbled on a blog by one Ms. Nithya Swaminathan - she had raved so much about 'Oru maalai neram' from Gajini.. I wanted to say 'Yes Nithya, I totally agree with you' and I required a blog id to do it.. and that's how this blog site was born..

Now to tell something about my ingenuity (one more reason for creating blogs: You can brag about yourself shamelessly!) - The blog name is Mind T(h)reads... look at the enormity of the word

Mind Treads - basically this blog will talk of the random walks my mind takes now and then
Mind Threads - An attempt to unravel the knots in my mind and to really get their ends
Mana Noolgal (if you translate threads into Tamil, it becomes noolgal, and this also means books) - so it could also mean the books (however meaningless they could be) my mind pens..

I assure you that my future blogs will not carry this much skepticism or news about how great I am. I rather would like to keep it very simple, on a very general level..

That said, let me start on this good day to make my thoughts public – I hope to see more of you visiting my blog and wonder ‘Wish I could write like him…’ (OK, I have started..)

P.S. I had saved this content to be published sometime early in September and I managed to do it now…. Hope, I’d be more disciplined in the future..